Family Bonding

The first thing that a person finds in life and the last to which he holds out his hand,
and the most precious that he possess, even if he does not realize it, is family life.
- Blessed Adolph Kolping

The history of mankind, the history of salvation, passes by way of the family...
The family is placed at the center of the great struggle between good and evil,
between life and death, between love and all that is opposed to love.
- Pope John Paul II

As the family goes, so goes the nation and so goes the whole world in which we live.
- Pope John Paul II

The family is the great catechism God has given the world. The work of our lifetime is to learn how to read it and then study it prayerfully.
- Mike Aquilina

So I had a Couple of Hours... and iMovie

As our little princess Clare turns an historic ONE this Saturday (which we can't believe), I thought I'd toss up this fun little summer diversion. I have to say the Boy Wonder is a natural, and took extremely well to my direction ("surprised face!" "Throw this!" "Run over here.") Be warned there is a climatic cliff hanger. Part two should be out, oh, next summer. Life gets busy! I'm just glad they will have these little snapshots when they are 15 years old, to reflect on how cool their dad was, in his sharper moments. Or how nerdy. Only time will tell.

I have a feeling nerdy will win out. Yeah!

What is It?

Our little boy has broken into the powerful realm of words and of communication; he has transcended the monosyllabic plateau! Yes, he is leaving his wee sister in the dust, for now. (I think her babblings are actually more advanced than any of us know)

When a road sign appears as we drive down the highways and byways, the oft repeated question comes, "What is it? What is it Daddeee?"

The signs are familiar to us, we've passed them by a thousand times. But for the Boy Wonder, everything is new. So we repeat them, we echo those words for him and he responds. The Greek word is katekhein. We call it catechesis!

Last week, at a beautiful retreat center in Lancaster County, I felt privileged to teach an intensive course on Blessed John Paul II's Theology of the Body to over 70 people from across the country and the world. In a certain sense, it was the same "old" Catholic teaching we've heard a thousand times; it was philosophical, densely theological, soaked in scripture, straight up Thomism. But for many of us, including myself, everything was new. It always is. Why?

Because we stepped out of our way to ask the question again, "What is it?" about the one thing we all, I have a feeling, have been assuming we already know so well; Christianity.


Herein lies the genius of John Paul II. He assumed nothing. He put his finger on the pulse of modern man, starting with himself, and asked the question, "What is it? What draws our hearts? What do we live for? Who am I? Who is God?"

This past week, we immersed ourselves in the Answer he had rediscovered. And it was not a program, or a list of prohibitions or principles, or a philosophy. It was a Person. A Communion of Persons to be exact. It was Love, rekindled.

“Man cannot live without love. He remains a being that is incomprehensible for himself, his life is senseless, if love is not revealed to him, if he does not encounter love, if he does not experience it and make it his own, if he does not participate intimately in it…. The man who wishes to understand himself thoroughly must with his unrest, uncertainty and even his weakness and sinfulness, with his life and death, draw near to Christ. He must, so to speak, enter into him with all his own self... in order to find himself. If that profound process takes place within him, he then bears fruit not only of adoration of God but also of deep wonder at himself… In reality, the name for that deep amazement at man’s worth and dignity is the Gospel, that is to say: the Good News. It is also called Christianity.”
- Redemptor Hominis, 10


"What is it, Daddeee? Christianity?"

It is Heaven kissing earth. It is the Divine Rescue of the fallen who cannot get up on their own. It is the Romance that fires all romances, it is the embrace of all of our eros, our passion rising up, with all of God's agape, His Fire of Love rushing down upon us. It is our deep amazement, our deep wonder, at Life itself, at the superfluous beauty of the Gift! And behold, unless we become as little children, asking our questions again and again on the roads of this life, we cannot enter into that Wonder, which is also called... the Kingdom of Heaven.

Into the Wild

So it begins, the summer. I've a number of talks lined up and projects to continue but what I'm looking forward to most of all is getting The Boy outside. He is ready. 

The plan: pull into the nature preserve, and release him. Let him be drawn to anything and everything that he desires (except poison ivy), to see, feel, romp and roll through. Throwing rocks, splashing in streams, chasing geese. "We need the tonic of wildness" said Thoreau, and I heartily agree!

Two Doses of Cuteness

Our little ones continue to amaze and delight us with their little blossoming personalities. Behold their cuteness!!

The Holy Spirit and Babies

I was driving to give a talk a couple of weeks ago on Marriage, Family, and the Sacraments, praying and preparing as the road zoomed below. I was pondering on just how these three things relate when I got zapped by the following thought...


Catholics say every Sunday in the Apostle's Creed that the Holy Spirit "proceeds from the Father and the Son." The Holy Spirit is the Eternal Fruit of the Love-Gift between the two Divine Persons of the Father and the Son. 


Whoa... If that sounds way too abstract, Augustine in the fourth century gave us a helpful image in saying that the Divine Love in the Trinity is "enfleshed" in the human love of Lover, Beloved, and the Love between the two. This image blossoms beautifully in Pope John Paul II's Theology of the Body in our own time. Stay with me friends while I try and work this out!


The Father loves the Son eternally. The Son receives that Love forever, and forever returns that Love. Since the Gift of Love is Eternal, the Fruit of that Love is in itself Eternal! In fact, it is a whole and distinct Person! The Holy Spirit. Anyone ever in love can attest to this Third Party, this seemingly separate and distinct ocean of Love in which the Two suddenly find themselves immersed in right up to their hearts. In vernacular terms, and here quoting Schoolhouse Rock "A man and a woman had a little baby.... yes they did. They had Three-ee-ee in the family. That's a magic number."





Now to get to the thought that zapped me on the turnpike heading west... The Holy Spirit, the Eternal Fruit of the Love between the Father and Son, we believe, is God operating in our hearts, moving us, inspiring us to Love, and Goodness, and Beauty, because that's what Love does. The Holy Spirit makes us holy, if we allow Him into our hearts, minds, and bodies. Just so, the Fruit of the Love of the earthly Lover and Beloved (baby!) makes us holy. Babies are like the Holy Spirit.... in the flesh! THAT'S IT! Huh?


A child coming forth from the beloved and the lover, a husband and wife, becomes the operative agent in our hearts, making us holy and whole. Children, like the Holy Spirit, break us and remake us. They bring us out of ourselves, they push us out into the deep where we never thought we could go, and they are the "occasion of grace" that can make us saints. 


So the new revelation in the spiritual life of our little family is to say "Come Holy Spirit! Speak to us, Your servants are listening" as we discern in the cries, laughter, smiles, gurgles, giggles, and yes, the poopie diapers of this domestic church, just what is the Holy Spirit of our children teaching us? 


For the family, holiness and the path to perfection are ever-present. The bells of the monasteries summoning us to prayer are the bellows of the baby crying out "Change me Dada!" And shouldn't my prayer to God be the very same thing? "Come Holy Spirit! Change me!"

Bye Bye Binky

"If you love something, set it free. If it comes back to you.... get more balloons."

BABIES to the Rescue!

First off, can we agree that the bustling world of Big People is very often a mess? I don't consider myself a pessimist, more like a hopeful realist, but I think we so-called adults can be too busy, too complicated, too angry, too focused on work, too focused on the weekend, too selfish, too serious... (or is this just my reflection in the mirror?). 

From whence shall come our help? To whom can we turn in this dark hour to save us from ourselves? How do we un-adult-erate the situation and get back to the simplicity of the "little children" who shall inherit the Kingdom? Do we look to the skies? Is it a bird, a plane, a self-help section? NO! Look down, it's a baby! It's time to obey those neighborhood street signs that command us to "Watch Children."

Recently, my wife and I adopted our second child, a beautiful baby girl. She was just two days old when we first laid eyes on her (and honestly we haven't taken our eyes away since!). Once again, God has given us the key for growing in holiness and happiness; a prolonged and profound dose of baby-gazing. This is what can save Planet Earth! I believe the remedy for war and terror lies in this simple act: that all men and women whose hearts are dark and angry, sullen or selfish, hurried or hollow, should hold newborns and contemplate life's fragile and superfluous beauty. Relish the gift. Receive the gift. That'll fix ya.

Last week, as if our little daughter wasn't enough of an elixir for wonderment, we rented a film we've been waiting to see called BABIES. It follows the lives of four very different families with four very similar infants from all over the globe, from birth to about the age of first steps. 

With a simple and minimalist manner, director Thomas Balmès lets us in on the precarious chain of events that turns babies into toddlers, from fumbling fists and bobbing heads, to learning to grasp, and play, giggle and crawl, to the final cinematic triumph of standing with the Big People. Throughout the film, we see essentially what babies see, having the camera cropped at that classic Charlie Brown height, where adults only appear as towering legs, and disembodied voices. 

We loved the movie BABIES, although at times we hated the seeming absence of adults in certain scenes - namely the ones in the open fields of Mongolia where little Bayar was crawling in between the gangly legs of goats and cows. Yes, we see the utter (no pun intended) vulnerability of these wee babes, but not just in the rural parts of the world, or the ancient ways of the Himba tribe living in their dirt floor huts with no water to wash their children. Even little Hattie, from San Francisco, has her own brush with a serious booboo at a local park. What was daddy thinking?

But BABIES isn’t all hair-raising thrills of course. It’s chock full of intimate scenes, little discoveries, and wide-eyed wonder. It brought to mind Chesterton’s thought that the “fascination of children lies in this: that with each of them all things are remade... that within every one of these heads there is a new universe, as new as it was on the seventh day of creation. In each of those orbs there is a new system of stars, new grass, new cities, a new sea...” (from the essay "In Defense of Baby Worship" 1903.)

Through Balmès’ vision, exempt of essentially any dialogue, we get a taste of that fascination again. But it might be tough for us Big Folk, used to explosions and fast-paced car chases. The film moves at a healthy crawl. This is good. We adults need to slow down. And we need to look up again too, like children. Though many of the shots are close-cropped, we often get big sky expanses that make us feel like the little ones again.

Though the “stars” of the films are the babies, (and shouldn’t they be in every family?), there are bonding moments in the movie between father and child, and mother and child especially. Readers should know this intimacy finds its purest expression in the breastfeeding scenes with Ponijao. Those sensitive to their older children seeing bare breasts supplying the gift of milk to their newborns might want to practice caution in viewing. I would say, though, to consider using it as a teaching moment for the little ones. Don’t we need a healthy and total vision of femininity and motherhood in our present pop culture, where the parts are so often accented that we lose the person? Here I think the Third World is way ahead of us. Here is the most ancient and beautiful bond being formed anew, and we are invited to drink it in just as well as the newborns.

I have discovered that BABIES, the film, and babies, the reality again in our home, have the potential to pull the selfless out of the selfish. When you become a Mommy or a Daddy, powers are unleashed that could not have been extracted in any other way, except perhaps through some great suffering or sacramental grace. It's amazing, exhausting, exhilarating.... "It is life nearest the bone where it is sweetest," wrote Thoreau. And looking at these little ones, we come to learn that’s really all we need. Life, as the film and our families proclaim, is good. Behold, it is very good.

I’ll close with the Top 10 Reasons Why Babies Will Save the Human Race:

10. Babies make adults talk to each other in parks, who normally might not give each other the time of day. Talking to people builds friendships, friendships build communities, communities build parks. Babies hang out in parks (and around and around we go!) 

9. Babies are utterly dependent on us, reminding us that we are utterly dependent on God. So we get a God’s Eye view of things for a spell; a little insight into what HE must be feeling for us. 

8. Babies learn everything from their parents, by watching, listening, studying, and looking up at Mommy and Daddy.... and so should we. Looking up at the world in wonder is always better than looking down on it as if you’ve conquered it. 

7. Babies are the greatest "man-made" creations in the universe; they shall grow up and outlive the stars, each in their own way altering the course of human history, each absolutely unique and unrepeatable. Wow. We need more babies!

6. Babies are completely innocent, regardless of the way they were conceived, and have no guile, no sarcasm, no agendas. They are pure as the driven snow, fresh as a sea breeze, vulnerable as a flower. We need more purity, sea breezes, and flowers in this world. 

5. Babies are meant to be the fruit of the loving marital embrace of a man and a woman; the word and act of their love becomes flesh! This human “trinity” of Lover, Beloved, and the Love between them is an icon of the Eternal Mystery of Who God is as Father, Son, and Holy Spirit! It’s the Great Dance of Love transposed into time and space in human love!

4. Let’s just read #5 again because that was INTENSE.

3. Babies are aware of everything and everything amazes them: lights, noise, colors, tinfoil, keys. We could all stand to be amazed again by the ordinary things around us. 

2. Babies see the world as their playground, a wonderful gift made just for them. And so should we.

1. Dr. Peter Kreeft once said that God continues to make Himself present in two places - at the altar and in the womb. What more can we say? Let's reverence Him in this hidden places, and find ourselves born again!

____________________________________
Originally published in the Catholic Standard & Times

Welcoming Clare

Signs, Signs, Everywhere's Signs...

"... I have made you a sign for the house of Israel..." 
- Ezekiel 12


This morning's first reading at Mass was a bit... dark. The prophet Ezekiel was inspired to literally embody the exile that unfaithful Israel was about to become. He "shouldered the burden" and dug a hole in the wall of the city and escaped in the darkness of night to show the people where their sin was leading them. A sign in his very body of what was to come. God loves teaching us this way, through physical signs and symbols.


A few millennia away from Ezekiel's experience, sitting in the church pew, close to my wife, with a hand on our little boy's soft head of hair, I had a whole other train of thought start chugging down the tracks of my mind. 


"I have made you a sign..."


The summer has allowed me to go, most days, to daily Mass with my family. I'd heard it from Rebecca but now I see how others love to watch our little boy - quite literally the "MASScot" of St. Charles parish. Playing with his books, begging for goldfish, and pointing to Father at the altar (affectionately referred to as "ZAH!"), he brings loads of smiles to the retirees, young couples, and rosary ladies (glue of the Church, seriously) who attend Mass with us.


"I have made you a sign."


It's easy to see that little squirt as a sign of God's love in the world. Any child still dripping with the waters of Baptism seems still in communion with the angels, don't they? But then I thought of Rebecca this morning, and myself, and our son. And the thoughts got bigger. We must all become like little children.... magnets of joy, wonder, trust, and love for others to see. We are a family. We are a sign. A sign in our very bodies of what is to come. And what is that, you ask? LOVE, BLISS, COMMUNION... THE ONENESS. A unity in distinction, three persons in one family. Sound familiar? Whoa. I got schooled by the Holy Spirit, once again. "ZAH!"


An examination of conscience kicked in.... What is the language of my body saying in that pew, in this place, in the grocery store, at the bank, the mall, the many places where we live and move and make our living? Eyes are seeing us.... this little family. Are we a sign of what is to come? We are called to be! Are we in love?

The history of mankind, the history of salvation, passes by way of the family... The family is placed at the center of the great struggle between good and evil, between life and death, between love and all that is opposed to love.

- Pope John Paul II 

I've seen and heard (and been) the counter-sign often enough. Visit a department store at a peak hour or sale and you'll hear all manner of unlove, non-bliss, disunion and indifference in families. With bitterness, division, fracture, and a radical individualism, we can become rotted out building blocks for a culture not long for this world. How can any society stand on such tremulous ground? This is starting to sound as dark as that first reading from Ezekiel this morning... In this present darkness, the faithful family does seem to be exiled!


Hmmm. Well, it's always darkest before the dawn, they say. And such darkness has a way of highlighting the light. Goodness, patience, charity, and basic human kindness have never shown so bright as now, when their absence can seem so mainstream. We have to pray that the morning star still rises in our hearts. And look for grace in the right place. We personally need to get our butts to Mass as often as possible. For into darkness we might go, but for the grace of God poured out on that altar, and deep into the heart of every child who believes. God help us!

To the family is entrusted the task of striving, first and foremost, to unleash the forces of good...

- Pope John Paul II

Into the Light

These are the final days before our little boy becomes a big brother. Another little life is coming our way! Another life that almost wasn't.

Several months ago, a young woman entered a Planned Parenthood center intending to have an abortion, but someone, some word, some inspiration, got her to get out. So right now, somewhere a little unborn heart is still beating, and maybe the pace has quickened as this week that little life is due to enter into the light of day. This child is even now taking in those final nutrients, that viaticum for his or her departure from a life in the womb to the next life, here and now. Praise God!

We are overwhelmed again at the fragility of life, at this new baby moving in that hallowed place that too often has become a place of terror through abortion. This new unrepeatable, inviolable little life is moving, and little does this little one know how he or she is moving us! These last few months a day hasn't passed without a prayer for the birth mother's peace and health and our little guy's new sibling. At Grace during dinner when we mention the baby, he gets a joyous little smile as seen here... in Exhibit A:

"Beh-bay!"


As for the Boy Wonder (adopted nearly two years ago!), we're treasuring these final days with him as a solo artist. This week he makes the journey into "Big Brotherhood."


We know things will change. The "appointed little king" as his name translates, will suddenly have a co-king, or queen! It's no longer just his universe in which to reign supreme. And we will have our hearts broken again at newborn beauty. How can we love this third (remembering our Gracie in Heaven) as much as the first? Good words have come from family and friends to help us along. 


"Don't worry, you don't have to share the love like splitting it in half. The love just multiplies!" Amen to that! 

So we've sanitized everything again with anti-allergen spray, bought more Dreft laundry detergent, installed another car seat, and we're getting ready for less than 4 hours of steady sleep a night (we get 4.5 now if we're lucky).

Ah parenthood! The great gift of God that can pull us out of ourselves and bring us to our true selves. It just takes a lot of giving, forgiving, humor, and help from above. And coffee of course. Goood coffee. Lots of coffee...

Expecting Grace

My wife posted a beautiful series of simple, a cappella songs she composed and sang for our little ones, loved and lost through miscarriage over the past seven years. There are special hymns for Grace Elizabeth, our precious daughter who lived just 10 hours in this world, and for our little boy who is almost and unbelievably two years old. I hope you can consider supporting her music, again, composed in the midst of our first steps with infertility, through the hidden gifts of the Snowflakes adoption program, and into the "cross walk" of our days with our unborn Grace.  She sings of the day Grace came, and returned to God, and she sings of the little Simon - our adopted baby boy - who came not a moment to soon to help us carry that cross. The link for the CD is here.

We pray for any and everyone ever touched by the pain of infertility, the loss of a child, and for those discerning adoption. Our full story of Grace is here, and we always welcome thoughts, questions, and comments on these most intimate of faith/life issues.

Peace and Prayers,
The Donaghys

The Golden Sea

"Tell me how many songs that I must sing before I can see you in your glory, hear your whole entire story, bathe inside your golden, golden sea?"

- Trevor Hall

I realize you just read the above quoted lyric, and maybe you liked it. I ask you to please read it again, and drink it in slow like hot, honeyed tea. Go ahead... It's delicious, isn't it? The song is 31 Flavors by Trevor Hall and is one of my favorite hymns to love. I discovered his music through one of my senior students last year - thanks Tosti!

So now.... give yourself a minute to ponder this: How many people do you really know on Planet Earth? I don't mean know about, or have encountered in your travels, or clicked "confirm friend" with on Facebook. I mean face to face, heart to heart, soul to soul friends.

How many people do we really know, deep down, to the core, and to the point of practically being able to finish their thoughts for them, predict their actions, read their hearts, swim in their golden, golden sea of experiences? Is it one? Two?

The only soul I can honestly say I know on that intimate, almost spousal level, is... well, my spouse.

As we approach our 7th wedding anniversary (just three weeks away), I've been thinking of her more and more. I mean really thinking of her. This whole marriage thing is pretty earth-shattering you know. What a blindingly brilliant thing it is to be able to say to another human being, "Come in..... look around. The place is yours." What a crazy thing it is to say to another person, (you with all of your sins and weaknesses, they with theirs) "Let's become One. I give you sovereignty here. I turn over the key. What's mine is yours and what's yours, I ask of you, let it be mine."

I am convinced that God gave us marriage as an aid or a preparation for Something More, Something Big. Namely, HIS entrance into the human heart, and our hearts entrance into the Communion of Saints in Heaven some day. Marriage is a "school of love" and a fertile field where the fruits reach high, "so high that I can almost see eternity" (that's Anne Murray by the way, not Trevor Hall). But to plant Heaven's seed you need to dig up that soil, scour those fields, remove the rocks and old roots of selfishness and greed and ego. Marriage is farming the fields.

We all speak of a forever love too. We want it to spread wings big enough to escape the fields of earth, of the gravity of time and death. We want to soar. But we know simultaneously that even as it soars, "at death do we part." As wonderful as my marriage has been these past seven years, I know it's not the be all and end all of my existence. We don't exactly "complete each other" - what human being could really do that for another? The sooner couples realize this the healthier the union will be! A certain debilitating pressure comes off the shoulders. Who is the ultimate Bridegroom after all? It sure ain't this Jersey boy. And who is the spotless Bride of Revelation, the wife of the Lamb? I say Rebecca is a close second ;)


And I would lay down and die
For one glimpse of those open eyes
How am I to describe
The one who holds the Sun's Fire

Earthly marriage is a foretaste of a Heavenly one. "The Spirit and the Bride say 'Come, Lord Jesus!'" The Immaculate Daughter of Jerusalem and the reflection of the Son's Fire in her eyes is what I see in Rebecca. And I can only hope she sees the Fire of the Son in me. Therein lies the daily work of marriage! What she shines with is more than her own making. In fact, when she shines brightest is when she is outside of herself - transparent in her mothering of our son, of her nieces and nephews, caring for those marginalized, the poor, the lonely and abandoned, and in her patient love and support of me, inspiring me, serving me in so many thoughtful ways throughout the day, always thinking of me. She shines with a "heavenly" light, like stained glass.

So there's joy and struggle and effort and grace as we share in swimming this "golden golden sea" of married love. And it's a beautiful opening hymn to the Communion of Saints that's coming! Maybe it takes us to the sea's horizon in this world, and then the veil lifts, to a Blessed Realm. Then the ultimate Marriage begins! Then we shall know and be known, we shall see and be seen, and we shall "hear our whole entire story, and bathe inside His golden, golden sea"  forever...

The Boy Wonder

With our little boy, our infectiously happy little boy, everything is amazing. We call him the Boy Wonder, for this is who he is! The Boy Wonder is our incarnate reminder of the call to LOOK, SEE, WONDER, and WATCH.

This, I'm learning again, should be the attitude of all those made in the image of the King of Heaven. We should open up and say awe every morning to the Divine Splendors that envelop us like swaddling clothes. Everything is made by Him, and is therefore amazing! Have we forgotten?

Everything gets a WOW from our little guy - trees, grass, cows, cups, sausage, ceiling fans, and the singing of birds. "It's amazing!" he cries in that inarticulate speech of the toddler (the angels are the only ones who can translate that stuff). It's amazing and is therefore simultaneously to be seen as silly and serious. Let me explain...

Silly, because it doesn't need to exist. It is utterly superfluous. So he laughs at it. Why is the grass green, the sky blue, the water wet, the moon blue? Who cares?! It just IS... it's magic. And I think he is right, it is. And this is very silly, and should make us smile.... a lot.

Serious, because it does exist. It comes to me, impresses itself upon me like a great weight of glory, like a sacrament, like red and like gold, and like light. It flashes and breaks over me like a wave and bids me receive it like a gift.... this Everything. So I open up and take it in, and this is very serious. The picture above is Adam in the Garden of our Backyard; lost in the sea of green, captivated by it all, he feels at the same time the task of Adam to care for it, and to cultivate it. And this brings joy, which, as C.S. Lewis once said, "is the serious business of Heaven."

I find myself itching to get him out into the wild. To show him more of the Everything; leaves and bugs and wind moving trees, birds and squirrels and everything that lives and that breathes and that has its being. I find myself looking forward to walks with him through light-speckled woods and up rocky paths. I can't wait to toss him into a massive pile of leaves, throw some froggie boots on and get muddy. Breathe the air, walk the earth, run, rummage, romp through this world that is our playground, classroom, Holy Temple, and our home. Funny how daddies look to the future (8 years old with an itch for exploration) and mommies look to the past (8 months old cradled in the arms). But every age is the perfect age.

And I pray this wonder is also the perpetual present.

Merry Christmas to All!

We were so proud of our little drummer boy, who sat for this homemade photo shoot (though truth be told it lasted about 36 seconds.) It's amazing what a hand towel, bathrobe, old belt and bed sheet can do in a fix! Wishing you all a truly blessed and faith-filled season of Light. Thanks for following the Blog!

The way to begin healing the wounds of the world is to treasure the Infant Christ in us; to be not the castle but the cradle of Christ; and, in rocking that cradle to the rhythm of love, to swing the whole world back into the beat of the Music of Eternal Life. - Caryll Houselander

The Boy Wonder Chronicles - First Steps!!

Grace is Everywhere

Hello All,

We've shared this invitation/request with a few friends and family already, but we are "sending" it out officially now.

Last year, we lost our precious baby daughter Grace Elizabeth. She was born on January 4 and died the same day, just 10 hours later. The full story of our day with Grace is linked here - http://missionmoment.blogspot.com/2009/01/our-amazing-grace.html. Needless to say, those 10 hours, and the 9 months she lived with us in the womb will never be forgotten. To celebrate her short life on earth, and especially her peace and joy now in Heaven, we want to invite you to "seek grace" with us in the signs all around us... literally.

If there was anything that Grace taught us (and there was so much) it was that most blessings in life are unseen, or easily missed, passed by, or even unlooked for. So now, let's look! If at any time you see a "Grace" sign, ie. Grace's Nails, Grace's Deli, Grace's Chapel, please take your photo in front of it (that's key), attach it to an e-mail, and send it to contact@missionmoment.org

We are compiling a photo album of Gracie's pics, and we'd love to receive one everyday, until we're old and grey. It will force us to slow down and think of her especially in that moment. Please keep a look out, Grace is everywhere!

Peace and Prayers, Rebecca and Bill

How Babies Can Save the Human Race

First off, let's all agree that the world is presently screwed up. For proof, click here. We're too busy, too angry, too focused on work, too ignorant towards each other, too selfish, too lazy, etc... (or is it just me?)

Well, don't despair! I've discovered in the past 10 months that salvation is near at hand.

BABIES CAN SAVE THE PLANET.

Oddly enough, you may have heard just the opposite. Some propose that babies eat up the planet's resources, that there is a "population crisis", and that we should all feel very, very guilty and irresponsible for not routinely contracepting and for ever considering having more than 1.5 children. Because aside from being stinky, babies leave a "carbon footprint" everywhere they go. As to the "population crisis" click here and check out Caritas in Veritate, section 44 to top it off.

But I believe the secret to building a happy, vibrant, life-affirming, love-soaked Civilization lies in a healthy abundance of those squishy Little People who are utterly dependent on us Big People. Here are Ten Reasons Why Babies Will Save the Human Race (feel free to add more reasons through the comment link below):

1. Babies make people talk to each other in parks, who normally might not give each other the time of day. Talking to people builds friendships, friendships build communities, communities build parks. Babies hang out in parks (and around and around we go!)

2. Babies learn EVERYTHING from their parents, by watching, listening, studying, and looking up at Mommy and Daddy.... and so should we.

3. Babies are the greatest "man-made" creations in the universe; they shall grow up and outlive the stars, each in their own way altering the course of human history, each absolutely unique and unrepeatable. How cool is that?

4. Babies are the fruit of the sexual union between a man and a woman. We need to be reminded that that's how it works.

5. Babies are aware of everything and everything amazes them: lights, noise, colors, tinfoil, keys. We could all stand to be amazed again by the ordinary things around us.

6. Babies smell really good.

7. Babies conversely can smell really BAD. They need us to clean up their "poopy." A constant reminder that we have our own "poopy" to clean up.

8. Babies are completely innocent, regardless of the way they were conceived, and have no guile, no sarcasm, no agendas. They are pure as the driven snow, fresh as a sea breeze, vulnerable as a flower. We need more purity, sea breezes, and flowers in this world.

9. Babies need us and we all need to feel needed.

10. Babies see the world as their playground, a wonderful gift made just for them. And so should we.

Prayers for Little Mary's Family

For those who have followed the story of little Mary Coffey, please know that she went home to God yesterday morning. Having lost our daughter Grace this past January, their story has been especially close to our hearts. Grace lived just 10 hours, little Mary was nearly three years old, and now these precious ones will always be remembered... always! The cross of their pain and suffering has been planted deep in our hearts, and has already touched so many! Now Grace and Mary both dance in Heaven's Song; as Catholics we believe in this reality! But the notes to that Song can sometimes seem very distant. May God comfort the Coffey's now, and all who have lost a little one, with the healing balm of His peaceful Presence. 

My friend Tony has captured a beautiful memory of seeing Mary Coffey the day before yesterday  and I wanted to share it with you below. His blog is here - The Joyful Faith

WEDNESDAY, JULY 15, 2009 Mary Coppa Coffey

Our great friends Jim and Felicia lost their beautiful and wonderful daughter this morning. We are so sad to lose this amazing treasure, but as Jim said to me this morning, they are at peace knowing that they have a Saint in heaven watching over them forever. they have all ready fullfilled their role as parents, they raised a Saint, they brought to the world a saint, and now she will be spending her time in heaven doing good on earth for her family and for others. I wanted to relate a story about Mary, I went and saw her yesterday, and it was really a very meaningful experience for me. Here was a little child who just underwent heart-surgery, but she was performing heart surgery on me, literally, staring at her was ripping my heart open. In the 20 minutes I was with her, I was beginning to understand something of beauty, and how much the world needs Mary. I thought to myself many times, wow, she is so beautiful, it taught me an amazing lesson, to look past the surface and look right to the heart, look right to the soul. Her grandpop said something to me that also struck me, without souls like Mary, the world would fall apart," Its good for our human hearts to burst when we see such beauty.

Daddy's Here.... Mommy's Here!

Our son is teething, which is the adult equivalent of having your skeleton slowly pulled to the outside of your body over a period of months. Needless to say, I'm glad I have no recollection of this happening to me. Perhaps this is why most of our first memories only go back to say, our 4th or 5th year of life.

So teething makes for some looong nights for all of us, especially mommy, who continues to amaze me with her lightning fast tenderness and penchant for turning anything into a soothing melody. We dole out lots of whispered songs and stories, walks down the hall and back again, and heartfelt assurances that "Mommy's here" and "Daddy's here." What else can we say?

We could try something like: "Listen little one, you're getting your teeth. You're going to love them! They will help you chew up your food. You'll be able to eat lots of new things with your teeth, things you couldn't eat before. Your teeth will help you talk to mommy and daddy and ask them all sorts of things because your teeth will work with your tongue to form words. And your teeth will bring a whole new gift to the world; your smile! It will be a way to let others know you are happy to see them or that something gives you joy. Teeth are a great gift! Trust me... it's going to be OK.... Daddy's here with you!"

And he would respond with something like: "AAAAAAAGHAHGHHGRR?#@!?WW"

I think we Big People can learn a little something about suffering from all of this pain our little ones go through. After all, I'm discovering that God the Father has written countless lessons for me right in the flesh and blood book of my family life.

"Everything speaks to me."

Don't we cry too in our moments of "spiritual" teething? We cry our, "God, why did such and such have to happen? Why didn't You stop this or that from happening? Why is there evil in the world? Why do the innocent suffer? And what is this painful longing and this aching thirst in me that I can never seem to quench in this world?"

The Father could try saying something like: "Listen little ones, you're getting your heart. You're going to love it! It will help you chew up the food of your experiences. You'll be able to taste lots of new things with your heart, things you couldn't swallow before. Your heart will help you talk to Daddy and Mommy and ask them all sorts of things because your heart will work with your mind to form words. And your heart will bring a whole new gift to the world; your spirit! It will be a way to let others know you are happy to see them or that something gives you joy. The heart is a great gift! Trust me... it's going to be OK.... Daddy's here with you!"

How do we respond to a Word like that?